The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

Category: Creativity
Author: Brené Brown
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by Jessieisfat   2018-11-10

You're looking for happiness in things. Everything you listed is on the outside. You are not defined by your degree. You are not defined by your job. You are not defined by your looks. You are not defined by your car. You are not defined by your house. You are not defined by a significant other. You're looking for yourself and your happiness in objects and adjectives. You're looking for happiness in things that can be lost or taken away. Stop it. Listen to me. If you want to change your life you need to change your mind. You need to read. I'm not talking about Harry Potter or Fifty Shades of Grey. I'm talking about something that is going to change your mindset. The only way to change anything in your life is by starting with the mind. Right now you thoughts are constantly thinking about the past and the future. Stop it. This is what is causing you to be depressed (thinking about the past) and anxious (thinking about the future). Happiness is in the present. The NOW is the only time period that matters. I'm going to list some book titles for you. They are simple reads but don't let that fool you. They are life changing. There are 3 ways you can read these books. Purchase the physical book, download the free Kindle app to your phone and purchase the Kindle version on Amazon or use Audible or Google Play audiobooks to listen to them. If you're not a reader then I strongly suggest looking up reviews on YouTube on each of these books. They will get you hyped up about reading them.

The first one you should read is The Power of Now. In fact if you read just one book. Make it this one.

Next, The Untethered Soul .

After those two I recommend in no particular order; The Four Agreements, The Habit Blueprint , The Gifts Of Imperfection (anything by this author really.) And 12 Rules for Life The Antidote to Chaos . This is a hard read but soooo worth it.

But start with The Power of NOW.

by alfsackboy   2018-11-10

I'm sorry that you are going through this OP. But there is nothing wrong with you. The only thing that is wrong is that society is very heteronormative which focuses on the idea that being straight is the ideal way to live. Everyone, including LGBTQ people, deserves to be happy.

Here are some psychology books that might help:

You Are Not Your Brain: The 4-Step Solution for Changing Bad Habits, Ending Unhealthy Thinking, and Taking Control of Your Life https://toptalkedbooks.com/amzn/1583334831

-This books explains a technique to deal with toxic thoughts which has helped people with OCD and anxiety.

The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are https://toptalkedbooks.com/amzn/159285849X

-This book talks about how to deal with feelings of shame (not for being gay but in a broad sense which still helps). Her next book Daring Greatly goes into further detail.

10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Improve Their Lives https://toptalkedbooks.com/amzn/0997389826

-This book is focused on the coming out phase of a gay man. You are more than welcome to email him if you need help because he helped me.

Man's Search for Meaning https://toptalkedbooks.com/amzn/080701429X

-This book is written by a Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist who explains ways of finding meaning. The first part of the book talks about his experience in concentration camos. The second part of the book is about his practice.

No matter what, as Brene Brown (the author of The gifts of Imperfections) said in her book: "You are always worthy of love and belonging."

by riomarde   2018-11-10

That’s great! I don’t know what you think about books, but I recently finished my MBA and we spent a lot of time thinking about our own behavior and the behavior of people we might manage in the future. There’s a couple really life changing books I read, first is the The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are and Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown. Those were and are just great books about how to deal with being a person. She also has a TED talk by Charles Duhigg. He also has a TEDx Talk .

When you said that your conversation about your success gave you the power to stop eating too much, it reminded me so much of what I learned from Brene Brown about the power of vulnerability and really just connecting to yourself and others.