Expecting Better: Why the Conventional Pregnancy Wisdom Is Wrong--and What You Really Need to Know
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About This Book
An award-winning social scientist uses economic tools to challenges popular misconceptions about pregnancy to counsel women on how to navigate contradictory and extreme abstinence-style advice to promote empowerment, reduce risks and enable practical choices.
Your Dog Advisor. It is completely free and you can find it here: https://yourdogadvisor.com/how-to-integrate-a-new-dogdog/
A great deal of research has found no impact on children of the mother occasionally drinks[1]. Of course, binge drinking is toxic and bad for unborn children. That is an extreme behavior and claiming no amount of alcohol is allowed is not credible.
[1] I encourage people to check out Emily Osters excellent book, expecting better: https://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnan...
She examines the medical literature and debunks many myths of pregnancy.
Oh sweetie, I think this is something everyone thinks about, and I don't know if you ever really feel "ready" to have kids. I know that I didn't--but 2 healthy kiddos later, we figured it out. We wanted to wait until we both had jobs, had our living situation figured out, and had been married for at least a couple of years. We felt "ready" and we started to try. I was still terrified when I found out I was expecting. Only you and your partner can decide when you feel "ready", but realize that it will never be the perfect time to have kids. Also, as a woman, you do want to keep in mind that the older you get, the harder it might be to get pregnant. (Not for everyone, but statistically.) It's something to keep in mind as you plan.
If you feel like you might be almost ready, talk to your partner about it. Talk about your hesitations. Are they big giant roadblock? of just little speed bumps? Does he have any ideas on how to work through them with you? Are you scared about being pregnant? having the baby? caring for the baby? What are your (and his) concerns?
Once you feel like you have worked through your major concerns, maybe set a date to stop trying to prevent (you have been using something to not get pregnant, right? that's important too) or a date to start trying. We waited until after a big trip we had been planning. Then, keep talking. Share your fears with him. Talk through them together. Maybe do some research or learning. It helped me to read about what to expect. Some books that I enjoyed or found helpful were:
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Pregnancy Related:
Babies:
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If you like to read, maybe give one or two a shot. You can also check out /r/Parenting and/or /r/BabyBumps to see what real parents are saying. Try to find some local moms to talk to about their experience--they can be a good support group later too.
If you are a planner, do some checking on things that you might need to know about (daycare, pediatricians, etc) if that makes you feel better. Look at costs, locations, ratings, whatever you need to do to feel secure.
Realize that even if you decide you are "ready" you may still freak out a little bit once it happens. Having a baby is scary and life changing, but that's okay! You can do this! You are awesome!
Also, here's a little secret that no one talks about --no one knows what they are doing with raising kiddos, we all just fake it til we make it and muddle our way through the best we can. I still feel like I'm just pretending to be an grown up with kids.
Don't worry about it. The actual amount you may have inhaled is minimal at best if this was outdoors. As for the pregnancy rules, you must remember, most of these rules are literally written for the lowest common denominator (stupid people). Most of the things they outright tell you to avoid during pregnancy, are absolutely fine in moderation and small amounts, but stupid people will take being told "in moderation" or "in small amounts" as "do it as much as I want, doctor says it's fine". This is why they just outright tell pregnant women to avoid most of these things. A friend of my wife's cousin wrote this book, Expecting Better: Why the Conventional Pregnancy Wisdom Is Wrong--and What You Really Need to Know. She goes into detail analyzing the real risks of most of the things you are told to avoid. She gave my wife a copy when she was pregnant, and it really helped calm her down.
woah, rude. everyone has the right to do what makes them feel comfortable. there's actually research that 1-2 glasses a week in first trimester and up to 1 a day after that is safe. there's a good book that talks about how these risks are likely wayyy overblown.
Another vote for Expecting Better, as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts.
For example, she says there's no problem with sushi / a moderate amount of caffeine.
My OB said that listeria is just an odds thing and that according to the CDC the same year soft cheeses had a listeria outbreak there was one in ICE CREAM - and you don't hear a single pregnant woman being denied their precious ice cream haha. So basically the moral of the story is that people latch onto some of these more than others for no particular reason. There have also been recent outbreaks in other foods that pregnant women aren't advised to never touch ever again. All of that to say listeria is very serious and we have to be vigilant but it's also important to educate yourself on what should truly be avoided. I recommend the book Expecting Better by Emily Oster who does a great job outlining what you really should or shouldn't do according to science and data - but makes it crazy easy to understand and you'll feel 1000x better and more comfortable navigating the world as a pregnant person after reading it.
Expecting Better.
> The doggo?
There are lots of threads you can search for here about introducing the dog to the baby. And here's a good link from the ASPCA.
Although my dog will always get tons of attention and love from me, I am trying to back off a little bit at the moment and pass her off to my husband. I don't want her to associate bringing the new baby home with being ignored by me, but I know that my focus will be elsewhere in the early days, so I'm trying to help ease into that now.
> What activities should I avoid doing for now? Foods I should avoid eating?
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.
There are so many old wives tales and outdated bits of advice being passed around that it's really useful to have someone look at the research that's been done (or not!) on them.
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.
For example, she narrowed the massive list of "banned foods" down to:
> Raw / rare meat and poultry (toxoplasmosis)
> Unwashed vegetables and fruits (toxoplasmosis)
> Queso fresco and other raw-milk cheeses (Listeria)
> Deli turkey (Listeria) [FYI - the deli turkey advice is a bit outdated. It was a bigger deal when the book was originally published, but now, I wouldn't worry about it either!]
And that's it!
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.
For example, she narrowed the massive list of "banned foods" down to:
> Raw / rare meat and poultry (toxoplasmosis)
> Unwashed vegetables and fruits (toxoplasmosis)
> Queso fresco and other raw-milk cheeses (Listeria)
> Deli turkey (Listeria) [FYI - the deli turkey advice is a bit outdated. It was a bigger deal when the book was originally published, but now, I wouldn't worry about it either!]
And that's it!
I've basically changed nothing. Sushi is my regular treat after every prenatal appointment ❤
Well, I'm still having caffeine, sushi, deli meat and the odd glass of booze (god bless Expecting Better !), so definitely sleeping on my stomach, being able to walk fast, and not having to pee all. the. time.
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.
https://toptalkedbooks.com/amzn/0143125702
I highly recommend reading Expecting Better , as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts and helps you make up your own mind about the various risks involved.