The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & ... Tolerance (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook)

Author: Matthew McKay, Jeffrey C. Wood, Jeffrey Brantley
All Reddit 148
This Year Reddit 64
This Month Reddit 5


by SaveTheEmpire   2019-01-13

Haven't opened it yet but I have this one sitting on my desk:

by kittypiddle   2019-01-13

I bought this one:

I’m still in chapter one. It’s a lot of work and I’m not the most motivated individual. Maybe we can be study buddies?

by hurt_kid   2019-01-13

You can always give this workbook a try to learn a few DBT skills:

It does get much better once you're able to work through your troubles! Try to avoid alcohol and other drugs (even weed). Nobody is perfect, but they do tend to worsen symptoms.

Then a lot of the stuff that BPD can make impossible to do: eat healthy, get a regular schedule (sleeping), 3 meals a day, try to get a little physical activity in (even 15 mins of walking is better than nothing). If you can at least get a check-up with a doctor, that helps a lot too. Sometimes physical ailments can worsen BPD.

Above all, it is beatable! One of the biggest things is to try to get past black-and-white/all-or-nothing thinking. That one is really hard. That's the big thing that individual DBT tries to get you past. There's also a group component that teaches you the four skills the workbook gives you.

by Untouchable-joy   2018-11-10

Changing thought and behavioral patterns are actually what CBT and DBT therapy were created for. If you don’t want to see a therapist to help you, there’s lots of work books you can do on your own. It’s proven very effective, it’s actually the most commonly used therapy (though part of that is it’s also quick.) It’s helped both myself with PTSD/bipolar/social anxiety and my mother who had BPD. Disclaimer: it’s not fun or easy, but it’s easier than trying to change on your own. Here’s a really good DBT workbook.

by EggumSchmeggy   2018-11-10

I wish i could help you more.. I deal with a lot by using dbt skills.

The actual book has helped me a lot, but i had found a free pdf version while using the computer. They get uploaded and taken down regularly.. It really helps to retrain your thoughts to not break yourself down. Like if you do the best you can and failed thats okay just dont make yourself feel worse by constantly replaying what could have gone better or why you suck and that youll never succeed. That is literally the key go having a good life; training your mind to acknowledge negative thoughts and actually learning how to replace them with good ones. Everyone knows it yet we all get lost on how to replace the we wont allow ourselves to change them.

If i were yoy i wouldnt stop posting what happens even if you think you know what everyone will say it never hurts to have people remind you that youll get through something and that youre worth something and you deserve to be happy. And it potentially could reach someone who is experiencing something similar and help them or it reaches someone and stops them from getting into a similar situation.

by the_itsb   2018-11-10

Hey there, we have something in common, I was smoking for the same reason! Weed was great for helping me gain some perspective and turn down the noise in my head and heart, but I want to learn to do that myself, without chemical aid, so here I am. I'm copying some stuff from another comment I made about what is helping me out, in case any of these things might appeal to you:

Also wanted to second the suggestions from others for exercise, that is really helpful for me, too.

Good luck! I believe in you. ��

by xhumptyDumptyx   2018-11-10

Sorry for the late response, if you haven't bought any yet this is the one I tried.

For CBT:

and for DBT:

I haven't tried the DBT one, but someone who's anxiety is likely worse than mine, tried it and recommended it to me. It also seems to be the most recommended DBT book on the interwebs.

by universemessages   2018-11-10


I recommend it for sure :)

by RedditAccountFor2018   2018-11-10

I recommend this book to nearly everyone with anxiety/depression/anger issues. Check it out. Its helped me immensely!

It may feel stupid at first but if you take it to heart, and actually stay committed I promise you'll come out a better person.

by nknwnbrdrln   2018-11-10

You might be able to find a therapist on here that specializes in it: I recommend asking if they've used it before, some people say they specialize in all kinds of things but dont actually have experience, and someone who is not experienced with BPD will have a hard time. Mentalizing therapy and Transference-focused therapy are also used for BPD.

Below are links that really helped me, that I sometimes send to people here who don't have easy access to DBT:

A good DBT workbook:

The book we used in DBT group is Marsha Linehan's DBT skills training book:

When I was waiting for therapy to start I soaked up as much info as I could in video form on youtube, which I actually found more helpful than DBT in terms of feeling real validation and emotional healing.

I found a torrent of From Chaos to Freedom which is basically Marsha Linehan (creator of DBT) teaching the skills herself. I like her, she’s pretty weird. Here’s a clip: “If it lasts forever and you think it’s a crisis... it’s your life, it’s not a crisis”

Tons of short videos of experts talking about borderline and DBT:

This one is full of lectures (many by the same experts) on more specific topics that I really liked:

Also, I posted a thing on splitting a while back that might be helpful, idk:

Hope this helps :) Sorry for all the links - I was soaking up info like a sponge when I was first diagnosed.

by CeladonDust   2018-11-10

Hey, another UK based bpd girl here. I'm so sorry that you're having such a hard time. Mental health services are a fucking joke here. It's all useless under 10 min psychiatrist appointments that you've to wait months for. Then they give you nothing. Or chuck you on another infinitely long waiting list.

You know this of course. Just adding to the pile of people angry at NHS MHS.

I know this isn't immediate help and you need something more intense with actual mental health professionals. But here is a link to a dbt workbook:

I worked through it with a therapist and it's very good. I know it's hard to do these things by yourself when you're already struggling. I wish I (or the NHS) could do more. But it might help a wee bit or at least be a stopgap until you get the help you need?

Hope things pick up for you soon. Feel free to pm me as well x

by Nomandate   2018-11-10

You should study up on this subject a bit. I agree throwing meds at mentally ill isn't the best approach. It's marginally successful, so it's what they do. A strapped system where your GP prescribes anti depressants is fucking crazy, in my opinion.

What's sad? A DBT workbook costs only $10, people can do it on their own, and it actually heals people. What doesn't it do? Enrich people.

CBT found just as effective with self study vs with a therapist (in my opinion, and in my area, you counselors are often counterproductive buecause they have their own issue, "rescue mentality" known as a offshoot of covert narcissism.)

by pistachioxo   2018-11-10

No worries! I'm doing pretty well lately, I've found a combination of therapy and medication that work for me so I've been working on getting my shit together and it seems to be going okay haha.

I just meant like if you're enrolled in post-secondary education, like university? Sometimes there are decent on-campus options for mental health treatment, so I just figured I'd ask! I'm glad I could help a little, validation is so important. I know it can be hard to manage your mental health when you don't have anyone to talk to, but from personal experience it makes things so much harder when you let yourself shut down and stop caring. Feeling isolated or sad sucks but forgetting what emotions feel like sucks even more. You kinda want to stop that negative mental feedback loop before you get there.

I grew up popping Advil when I thought a headache might start, and I didn't hesitate to start chugging DayQuil when I felt a cold coming on. So when I was diagnosed with a mental illness and there was no immediate cure I felt that frustration too lmao you're not alone.

Finally seeking help was the best decision I ever made. It wasn't instantaneous, but the treatment has been really worth it for me. I finally feel like a functional human being and like I said, I'm slowly getting my shit together. I don't experience delusions the same as I used to, and when I do find myself falling into that pattern of thinking I can use coping techniques I've learned in therapy to ground myself again. Mine used to be very repetitive/unrelenting like you said, and now that my medication doses are finally balanced I legitimately have so much energy. I didn't consciously realize how draining it was to have all that going on in my head, but once it's gone or at least managed a bit better, I think quality of life increases a ton.

I live in Canada so I think our healthcare systems are similar at least? I do highly recommend looking around for counseling options in your area, either through a private therapist or something community-based (like group therapy, etc. that's usually more affordable). Most psychologists have seen a lot of shit in their careers, so I'm sure your case wouldn't be particularly weird or abnormal. If the whole process seems really overwhelming, I can also recommend you an online service called BetterHelp. I've never personally used it but I've heard really good things, and they're available all over the world because that's how the internet works haha. You fill out some information about yourself and usually within 24 hours you'll get paired with a licensed therapist you can talk through things with (live chat, phone chat, or video chat) and if you're not really clicking with them, you can request a change with no questions asked. There's a fee but it's fairly affordable compared to in-person counseling, plus they offer financial aid and they often have promos for free trials or one free session a month, stuff like that.

If even that seems like too much right away, I think journaling is really therapeutic and it's proven to help with mood and organized thinking. Personally I feel like there's something about writing my feelings and stuff on paper that really helps me process my thoughts better. That might help encourage you rationalize more as well. Kind of along the same lines, workbooks can be really helpful in working through stuff. I've gotten a lot of use out of the Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook, and I literally always recommend it to people on here. DBT takes the best parts of cognitive behavioral therapy but approaches treatment with the assumption that the individual struggling is always trying their best (CBT to me kind of pushes a bit of a "try harder" mentality, which I find useless). It also incorporates mindfulness, aka my best/fav coping strategy for dealing with mood swings, delusions, etc. because it really helps you stay present, aware, and grounded. It might benefit you too.

Sorry I'm on mobile so this is messy as hell, but this is the book on Amazon UK if you're interested:

That's all I can think of for now I think? Sorry for the novel, I suck at knowing when to stop. Let me know if you have any questions or anything :)

by Nomandate   2018-11-10

Here is a free copy of the DBT self help workbook

Edit: wow! I'm so glad that everyone could find this useful! I had just printed 3 copies yesterday, one for each of my two daughters and one for my wife. They've all promised to try again �� Praying they do. (BPD) everyone on earth could use this wonderful guide and a recent study proves that DBT self help is at least as successful as expensive (and sometimes difficult and slow to acquire) guided therapy with a trained therapist. Here are some additional resources:

And if you would like a printed copy of the book it's inexpensive READ THOSE REVIEWS! I was able to "sell" my daughter on this method by having her read the amazing reviews of life's improved (dare say, saved) with this workbook. (I have no affiliation, I'm just a co-dependent caretaker.)

GOOD LUCK everyone with your struggles, and thanks for the gold :)

by ssnakeggirl   2018-11-10

I'm sure it's not easy - if you can get help without talking to them that is also an option, but it's going to be easier with family support. I have a less than good family situation, thankfully my parents are alive but they aren't always emotionally available or helpful. I know that it's not easy to ask for help. If you can't, you can't, but I would at least try and see how it goes. It's your family though and you know more about the situation than I do.

Can you start with free online resources? There are some DBT workbooks online and SMARTrecovery has a lot of online resources. I use this book but I'd start by looking at free resources to see if you are interested before you purchase anything.

by throwaway-person   2018-11-10

Yall need DBT :) it's like a whole class on how to cope with things in a more effective, healthier way.

If you can't access a therapist or therapy group that does this, the same book they use as a basis for the therapy can be bought on Amazon. Link and full title:

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotional Regulation & Distress Tolerance

by throwaway-person   2018-11-10

I'm in the US under a different system, but wanted to say that the age excuse would be unheard of here. I myself have been trying psych meds and therapies since I was like 12, and many kids here are medicated far younger than that.

For changing thought patterns, see if you can find a doctor that does CBT (Eta AND/OR DBT). If you have issues accessing doctors that can do this, amazon has the same workbooks my therapists used as a basis for this therapy and they can be helpful even if you go through the workbook on your own.

ETA amazon links:

DBT workbook Dialectical Behavioral Therapy Skills Workbook; The one my therapist used

CBT workbook Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks: A Workbook for Managing Depression and Anxiety

Companion book to CBT workbook Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Made Simple: 10 Strategies for Managing Anxiety, Depression, Anger, Panic, and Worry

by throwaway152038   2018-11-10

I suggest this book

You can get it also as a PDF on various sites.

It's an approved and effective self-help book by the ABCT.