I hope you have a therapist and psychiatrist you see regularly to help as well.
As someone who struggles with anxiety, I suggest doing what I’ve started: invest time in digging out the root of your depression. IMO this sounds like a lot of self-talk, digging yourself into an idea of who you are or a problem you caused when in fact the issue is much more minute or even non-existent.
I’ve found cognitive therapy very helpful. It’s a great way to figure out a general prognosis of what kind of anxiety/depression you’re facing. You shouldn’t have to live your days cowering over this. I’m using this workbook currently and it’s already given me great insight as well as exercises while I search for a therapist. It may not be right for you, but perhaps a good start.
Hookup culture is full of expectations, but it sounds like you honestly got a cool dude. Don’t fret: based on your account of events you did a great job of pleasing him and making his night.